GSP Admits to Cheating

Written by Tom Ngo
March 21st, 2009

After nearly two months of emphatic denials, UFC welterweight champion Georges St-Pierre has finally decided to man-up to his illegal activities. “Yes, I did cheat. I did cheat everybody. I can’t handle the pressure anymore, I’m falling apart…”St-Pierre’s sarcasm echoed loud and clear and he continued by saying, “I did cheat, but not in the way that people think.”

The French Canadian goes on to describe his cockamamie scheme in which he paid a man to grab BJ Penn and kiss him on the lips during his Octagon entrance at UFC 94.

St-Pierre claims that after the man landed his closed-mouth smooch, all of Penn’s powers were immediately taken away, allowing the 170-pound stud to dominate through the better part of 20 minutes.

Ok, so the drunken fan probably acted on his own when he landed the peck on BJ’s cheek, but something out of the ordinary must have happened on January 31st that would have enabled GSP to manhandle Penn so thoroughly, right?

I mean, there is no possible/legit/are you out of your mind way that a fighter of Penn’s caliber could possibly be beaten like that. That’s what Penn and Co. have been stating since the loss, and have been out for answers.

Thus, begins the blame-game.

“In a way it bothers me, he said that I’m a liar, I’m a cheater,” stated an irritated St-Pierre. “But now it’s over my head and the thing I can do to piss him off even more is to help Kenny Florian kick his ass. And that’s what I’m gonna do. Kenny Florian is coming in April, and I’m going to help him out as much as I can to beat him up.”

Florian is slated to be Penn’s first UFC lightweight title defense since he defeated Sean Sherk at UFC 84 last May. A definitive date for the bout may be set once Penn concludes his “I Was Cheated” crusade.

In the meantime, St-Pierre considers it a non-issue.

“This whole thing is over,” St-Pierre stated. “We went in court and we won. But he keeps talking.”

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